So I hope all you Mofo’s had a FABULOUS holiday, whatever you celebrate. I must tell you that I had the most entertaining, wildly hilarious, most memorable and BEST Christmas yet! My family and I treked up to the North Country (also known as Chicagoland area) to spend the holiday with our family up there. It was my daughter’s first Christmas, so that automatically made it special of course, but there were many more memorable, pee box (hehe Linz) moments than I ever thought possible over a 6 day period of time. My cheeks (the ones on my face, don’t get dirty on me people) hurt from laughing so hard.
We drove up Tuesday evening after Mark got off work, and I think my BEST move EVER was to book a babysitter for travel day. I am always a complete BITCH on days we travel from the stress of getting us all organized and packed, plus taking care of the baby. SO, this time I decided to have our sitter come over at about noon so that I could focus on packing/organizing/last-minute shopping, while SHE took care of Hayden. I tell ya what, I think Mark thought for SURE I had taken 3 xanax or something because he could not believe I was as calm and collected as I was when we pulled out of the driveway…and the ENTIRE 5 hour ride in the car. Woohoo!
So Wednesday evening, I received the BEST Christmas gift I’ve ever gotten. My sister took me to the spa she works at (Weis-Morris) in Rockford for a facial and a pedicure. It was SOOOO relaxing and lovely! However, before that we went to a Tapas restaurant right next door called Five Forks Market.
Now, if any of you have ever had Tapas, you may have known what to expect. I, on the other hand, was completely stunned. My sister told me that this was basically a deal where you each order an “appetizer” and then share amongst each other. SUPER, right?! So, Mark ordered one, I ordered another, and then my sister ordered one. I ordered this butternut squash ravioli with seared scallops. Sounds fantastic, right?! Well, I think if I had eaten more than half of a scallop and 2 raviolis, it would have been! Seriously, folks, we shared THREE plates and Mark and I just looked at each other like, is that all???
So I ordered Jimmy John’s while I was getting my pedicure…But hey, I tried something new, and I learned that if you want appetizers, go to Applebee’s…or Chili’s…or Friday’s…well, you get the idea.
Another notable moment was Christmas morning. Santa had come…or my step-mom kept saying it was my dad. So I really couldn’t tell ya who it was. But somebody came down the chimney and put candy in our stockings and gifts under the tree. Barb (my step-mom) kept mixing Santa and my dad up. I can see why, after all, my dad DID grow a snowy white beard this winter…Anyway, after Santa came, we decided it was time for Hayden to open up all her presents…over Skype with my mom and Grams in Arizona…
They were kind of in a rush so we had to help her along, and while I was helping her, I noticed my step-mom was opening up her presents as well. My dad had encouraged us all to open our gifts and said he would wait until the end to open his (which is actually tradition in our family for some reason), and so everyone just went for it…step-mom included. I was helping Hay and looking over at Barb thinking, gee, that present looks EXACTLY like the one my mom sent for ME…same wrapping paper, same shape box, everything. Well, I didn’t think too much of that and continued with Hayden and trying to keep her from smashing the keyboard on the laptop while trying to get to her Grandmas on the screen…and then Barb opened the box to find a pair of jeans…in my size…And sheepishly she said… “Oops, I don’t think this is mine…” Sorry Mom! Barb opened MY present!!!
So after all of the excitement with my mom and grandma, Mark and I exchanged gifts. He opened his gift from me, which was a pair of noise cancellation headphones…that he didn’t ask for but DESPERATELY needed and he completely flipped out about it! I LOVE it when that happens, you know? You get the PERFECT gift for someone that they didn’t even ask for. So then it was my turn, and he told my dad to make sure he had the video camera on because I was FOR SURE going to cry at the card he got me because it was so mushy…No such luck. I’m not a crier, folks. It’s just not me. Soooo, after recording my non-reaction to the card, dad turned off the camera just in time for me to open my gift from Mark…the UGLIEST pair of “slippers” I’d ever seen. O. M. G. I didn’t know what else to do but laugh…and so Mark felt terrible and decided he had ruined Christmas. I told him that it wasn’t true at all and that he had given me something to write about! Although I did ask him what on EARTH posessed him to buy them, to which he replied, “your sister told me you’d like them.” Note to Mark, my sister and I have VERY different styles and she has NO clue what I like. HA.
So all-in-all, it was a great trip. Those are just a couple of highlights from my very memorable holiday. I hope all of you mofo’s shared as many laughs as we did. And I hope you shared just as many Captain & Coke’s as we did as well.
Til next time…