Tuesday April 15th

Yesterday was my only day off this schedule until next Thursday & since I hadn’t heard back on any Monday Lunch outing plans from Steve, I decided to just stay home on my side of the river. I hadn’t really any plans to DO anything else other than Monday Lunch but.. whatever.

I ended up going in to work anyway for 6 hrs so my daughter could study for some college tests. I baked the Hell out of about 18 dozen cookies for both work & the upcoming Drumline Band Performance in Dayton. They leave tomorrow & I’d promised them all COOKIES to munch on during this outing.

By the time I left I was quite tired & had there been plans for a lunch, I may have skipped it anyway b/c I was in a bit of a fogbank so when I pulled out of the new hospital’s parking lot, for some reason, I turned the car right instead of left & found myself heading S on 135 towards Spooky’s house.

I’ve not seen her for awhile b/c Im a horrible friend & I’ve neglected our friendship terribly. I’ve been too busy for this or too tired for that or I’m down in LV w/MoFo friends instead of driving the 6miles to her house to see her.

It wasn’t guilt that made me go there yesterday, it was most likely just plain old missing her. That & the fact she/we have this connection. I always seem to know when she needs to see/talk to me & vice versa.

Once I woke up in the middle of the night thinking about her & got up & rang her house. She had been sitting @ her table, writing a letter to me & wasn’t surprised @ all that I called. We do this often but then I do it often w/many people I love deeply & whom mean the world to me.

I pulled up & her dogs barked only once. I smiled @ them & reached thru the fence. They know me well. Perky answered the door & stood there shaking his head @ me. I said, I know, I KNOW.. I’m horrible & I’m a few weeks late. He said, It isn’t just that Dawn. It’s the fact you never disappoint me in arriving here after we’ve just been talking about you. I just grinned, hugged him & said.. She & I may be apart, but we are still together. I would miss her if she ever left my heart, but it is my head that hears her calling to me & I come. Hugging me back he said, Yeah, I know. She’s asleep right now but she said you’d be by & here you are. I just hugged him harder & kissed him Hello on his cheek.

He stepped aside & let me in & I was immediatly attacked by nine assorted colours of wannabee puppies. Obviously, one of her dogs had a litter & they were adorable! I squealed with delight & dropped to the floor & was assaulted by 36 baby paws, 9 noses, 9 tongues & 9 squiggling bodies of puppy love.

As I sat there wallowing them about, Perky did the dishes & we chatted about things, life, you know, surface chatter stuff. It was good. I’ve missed him too, he’s such a goof but an honest, sincere, loving, hard working, honourable & sweet goof. He is good for Spooky. Always has been. He loves her & she loves him. It is always good in their home.

Perky had to work so he left a bit later. I fixed some lunch for us to eat when she awoke, baked a lovely chocolate cake, took the puppy mob on a stroll about the yard while waiting for Spooky to awaken. She didn’t stay asleep long, we Narco’s dont’ always take long naps & when she came out of the bedroom, she started giggling b/c she knew I’d be there.

We talked & Talked & TALKED for hours about girly things; men, chocolate, sex, food, kids, pets, money, men, chocolate, sex, food, kids, pets, money, men.. you know, the IMPORTANT things in our lives until I reaslised the clock was nigh on midnight-thirty & I had to leave. I had to work today & I needed to go home & crash.

She asked if I’d stay as Perky would be home quite soon and would be bringing pizza. But I had to go. She cried, I cried, I didn’t want to go home just yet but I had to leave, if I didn’t then, I mightn’t make it home & end up sleeping on the side of the road again.

I drove home thru the thick dark thinking to myself how much Spooky means to me & yet for some reason, I find it hard to make time to see her as often as she deserves or I should say, as often as WE deserve.

I need to change this.

I need to be a better friend.

I wish there were more hours in the day, more days in the week, more weeks in the year and more years in our lives.

I also wish there was less gray on my head, more sight in my eyes, more pep in my step, more Umph in my ass, LESS junk in my trunk, more money in my coffers, more gas in my car, less exhaustion in my eyes, less miles in between us and yet, there couldn’t be more love in my heart for this woman and her presence there, takes no space away from my other friends that I adore.

She is a wonderful lady, I am honoured she still counts me as her friend.

Even when I don’t darken her doorway as often as I should.

I believe that all things happen in our lives just as they should happen even if I’ve choices to pick from, in the end, it all evens out & what goes around does come back around to me in one way or another be it in this life, or my next.

Perhaps I wasn’t supposed to go to lunch yesterday, perhaps I was supposed to stay here, right here, and take care of a friend who loves & misses me instead of indulging myself with my bi-monthly Luncheon outing w/my men friends & whomever else comes along, on the other side of that river’s bridge.

Perhaps instead, I was to spend the day w/a lovely woman, who loves me as much as I do her.