Disclaimer: This article is intended for men and men only.
Ladies, while I’m terribly sorry, I can’t do much for you. If you crave to be fucked, and have been told by more than three non-family references that you’re a hot piece of ass, take the first flight to Indianapolis, Indiana, and I’ll see what I can do. There’s nothing else I can offer in the realm of advice.
Oh, by the way, I do require phone numbers for those references.
Okay Virgins, if you ever want a chance to use that Lincoln log you call a penis, listen up. The following article is a twenty-four hour guide to getting laid. Meaning that if you have any plans over the next 24 hours, you’re going to cancel them. Yes, because in the name of your masculinity, you’re going call Grandma and cancel brunch. You’ve long shamed our gender with your