Me: I’m so stressed out. I keep wanting to just rip my face off. Kind of like when the bad guy rips their mask off in the movies and they’re really someone completely different underneath. I just keep hoping that maybe I’m not me and there’s some other life waiting for me
Male Coworker: I don’t think ripping your face off would turn out just like that
Me: Yeah. I’d be all gross and end up looking like Predator with a big vagina mouth
Male Coworker: In that case, wanna go out for drinks?