I know not!

This is the woeful story of the man who traversed the shopping districs of Indiana. In search of a single sweat-shirt and has again been denied..
So on the rainy cold mornings of the past few days I have searched High and low for a University of Alabama sweatshirt. They are only the number two ranked college team mind you and are matched with Florida for a Flawless season..I began my search at greenwood mall and was shocked to find that they carried virtually every other team..when asked the salesman said we carry Notre Dame and Colts with a smile on his uber retarded face. To this I responded as any fan of a team would and asked him ” Did I ask for Fucking Notre Dame or colts?” at which point I was kicked out of store number one. I am strapped for time so lets go ahead and skip to store 13…Outlets in Edinburg only sports store there even carried Michigan gear but no UA. Indiana has no Bama Gear at all which in itself being a sin is astounding.. If anyone knows where in the bowls of this state the merch is hidden please let me in on the secret..