I don’t wanna spend my life jaded… waiting…..

I’m sitting in the computer lab… Carrie Underwood’s song Wasted is playing in the background. The lyrics got me to thinking… “I don’t want to spend my life jaded, waiting, to wake one day and find that i let all these years go by wasted…. ”

I graduate in May as you all know. And I am very unsure of what I am going to do with myself. First I was moving to Texas, then Pittsburgh, then Denver, then South Carolina. These decisions all within 6 months, I didn’t commit to any of those because as much as I want to leave I don’t think I would be able to stay away. I have so much here yet I don’t know what to do with it all. My lease is up in July and Blake and I have talked about moving in together, but I don’t know if I’m ready to live with a boy. The smart thing to do would be move back in with my rents and save up some money so that I could buy a new car. The car I drive now is theirs and they will probably want it back (even though I have torn it up to all hell)

I don’t want to waste any time though, which is why moving away would probably be a bad idea. Yea it would be a good experience, but why waste time away from those I already know and love? My family is here… and yea some of my good friends have moved away but at least they are pretty decent vacation spots.

I just want to figure it all out.