Boy Scout FOUND!


Last year the BIG news story was that Boy Scout who wondered off from the pack and got lost in the mountains. Well like a week later they found him on the other side of this mountain. I was pissed! I’m seriousface, I was praying something ate him. I know you think it sounds harsh but I mean come on, he deserved it. The kid was 13 and he said fuck it and wondered off on his own, you can’t do that crazy white boy teenage rebel shit. You’re not a Marine, you’re not a trained survivor, you’re a fucking boy scout! You can’t defend yourself against a bear, or a mountain lion or a Michael Jackson. I was praying the news would come on and a bear got a hold of this kid, they’d show a picture of the bear and he’s wearing the kid’s Boy Scout scarf, holding his handbook in one hand and a bottle of ketchup in the other hand. I wanted something bad to happen to this little bratty “I do whatever I want” mindset child so bad I almost tracked and ate him myself. You shouldn’t talk to strangers! (stab)