If you haven’t heard, I’m currently planning my wedding. I’ve been having a ball figuring out the particulars. My mom is making my dress. She’s been custom making dresses and costumes for a long time now. She done many of my high school dance dresses, my sister-in-laws dress and many items for friends and family.

My sister is making my wedding cake. All three of my nieces will be my flower girls. I’ve decided to do a hog roast instead of having it catered. I don’t need a florist because we’re growing our own flowers. I’m having the ceremony in my mothers front yard in the gardens. The reception to take place in her back yard immediately following. I’m even thinking about renting a moonwalk for all the youngsters. All meaning tons!!

Sounds like I’ve got my big day all figured out. And for the most part I do. I now just have to figure out how to get my father and his side of the family to attend. My parents haven’t talked to each other in over 10 years. He informed me that due to the fact that I’m doing this at my moms house, he will not be attending.

That’s a pretty big blow. Most every girl dreams of having her father give her away. I do. I want to have that one dance with my father as his little girl.

I’m determined to get him to set aside his feelings for one day. I’m determined to get through to him. I just don’t know how. It’s a pretty delicate situation considering our past. I’m going quite nuts trying to figure out this mess and how to approach him with out him putting his defenses up.

Its that time of year again. I love it.

I was enjoying a Jr. Bacon and Chicken Nuggets with Honey for lunch today while chatting with a very hung over Joby. (( I’m glad we’re still friends)) Any way, the conversation had lead to finding things to inspire and my feeling like I have no inspiration. I then continued to think about it after I left the boys to their killing of mens.

What inspires me?? I have a good job that, yes, I do love. Yes, it does frustrate me often, but that’s true with any job. I don’t look at this like a job either. I look at this as something I want to do for a very long time. I’ve even been dreaming about opening my own venue. MBP isn’t going to be around forever. That’s just the simple truth.

But what inspires me?? I’d love to say that its my daughter. But that isn’t even true. I think about her every day. She’s a key part of my life. I live my life for her. But that isn’t inspiration. That’s love. I’d like to think her adoption inspires me. And to a point it does.

Is it supposed to be the life that I am living?? Is it the life I’m working towards creating?? My future?? Fuck, I can barely think about what I’m going to wear tomorrow compared to next week, next month, next year, the next 10 years. I don’t think about the future because I’m to caught in what I’m trying to do now.

Do I want the lives my sisters have? With their husbands and their 3 children, a house, dogs, gardens, and gutters. To be honest I’m not all that willing to give up my life to have those things. Things I don’t think I want. I mean I want a house, and a dog. A garden even. But kids??

What is inspiration? Is it what gets you up in the morning? Is it what makes you go to your job?? Is it what makes you do what ever the fuck it is that you do??

Is anybody every really inspired daily??

Is it just a simple thought that can inspire? A simple random thought that inspires you to do something completely random? Does it have to be a person? Is it a breakup? Is it your girlfriend cheating on you? Is it your mother passing away?? Did you cat die?? Did you see a blue lighter lying on the ground and at that instant you want to jump off a bridge attached to a bungee cord?

none of this is really that important. I just felt like a rant. I’m not having any kind of emotional freak out cause I’m not inspired. I am inspired. And I’m inspired daily. It’s the little things that inspire me. The things I never notice. And the things that I do are just that more memorable. Like it being September. The air is very fall like. My favorite time of year.

I was just thinking about it and had to blog.

I’m kinda stressing over this Training Program that I’m trying to put together for my company. I’ve been putting a lot of thought, a lot of work and a lot of research into this program. It really isn’t as easy as it sounds. I’m trying to put together a complete “New Hire” Packet which includes all of the nessecary legal forms that we as a small business/food services/ catering company are required to have on file for our staff.

Oh wait!! “Ashley Anne, can you put together a menu, type up the event order for CSX and then fax over a copy of the Hors d’oeuvres list to this number. Then I’m going to need you to pack the party for tonight, pick up food. Oh and could you work on this marketing project? Don’t forget you have a Dinner Buffet to work tonight! While you’re at it sign over your heart and soul and we may give you a raise, but don’t count on it.”

So I’m pretty busy with the stuff I already have going on. To top it off I’m hesitant to do too much. I’ve put a lot of energy into my past jobs, doing side projects making suggestions and never once have I had any type of positive feed back from any of it, never a thank you, never any appreciation. Its always been that way for me. Even in past relationships I give and I do. I’m really tired of nobody caring to even give me a simple thank you.

Here I am with a Cold Bird for a Boss. She runs her company with an iron fist and an even scarier frown. Sometimes she can be rather pleasant… but it isn’t often. For Mary to tell one of us that we did “ok” is saying alot.

I finally emailed her this morning while I was at my desk, ((which was maybe a whole 5 minutes)) and I told her that she and I need to sit down and talk about this program. So we shall see!! I actually still need to check my Outlook……

Do I tell her that I’m hesitant about doing this? I should mention that I’m actually supposed to have help with this from two other co-workers… And I’ve been the one on the phone with the Chamber, with our company Lawyer …..

Do I tell her my reasons? Do I go ahead and give it 110% of my attention when I’ve been burned in the past? I want to do this. It is something that needs to be put into place.

I really want to pull my hair out……

So I’m kinda lame…

really lame…

I actually kinda shy… Believe it or not.
If I’m not very comfortable around you, I don’t have much to say. But once I shed that skin… WATCH OUT!!

So Today, I was called in to work this Luncheon @ WFYI Channel 20 (PBS)

There was this totallllly hot guy working sound… I could barely keep my eyes off him… Seriously… I’ve never been that awe-struck.

So… I decided that you only live once, and at the end of lunch I’d give him one of my business cards from work. Damn the luck I was out. BUT I had the handy dandy Mojo card with my url on it!! (THANKS RYAN!!) I scribbled my cell# down and pumped myself up in the bathroom. (pep talks in the mirror!)

I walked by where I’d seen him working all day… and he wasn’t there *sniffle* *double sniffle* And I couldn’t stick around and wait for him because I had a meeting at Martin University @ 3:30 It was already 2:30…

So I gave the card to a co-worker of mine, Kent, and described the guy and all but got on my knees begging him to give it to him. (I’m that lame) Kent then asked me what Indymojo.com was…

So points to me for telling Kent about the mojo… and maybe some other very attractive person of the opposite sex…

I’m so lame

Lets all keep our fingers crossed in hopes that Kent gave it to him like he said he did. When I saw him back at the office I all but tackled him asking him if he gave it to him. LAME! He said that he did. We’ll see… I’m not that lucky.

Oh my wow!!

I must say my weekend was a long one. But by far one of the most entertaining weekends I’ve had in a long time. I worked for MBP Catering this weekend. They needed help with the Air Show this past weekend. I went into this not knowing what to expect.

I ended up working on a big Refridgerated Sysco truck with my mom. Making up bowls and bowls of food. Every time one of the servers needed something for one of their parties, they’d come to my truck. It was nuts. I had a blast. After we got everybody feed we were able to relac a little bit and watch the show that was going on.

Those pilots are nucking futz!! I had goose bumps all weekend. Seeing those planes tumble and twist and spiral in the sky, WOW!! They even make their planes stale while they are in the air, then restart the engines as the planes begins to decline. That is kind of scarie to see and hear. I was on that big truck with no windows, just a side door, and the back door. So as we were working you’d hear the engine die and nopt really understand what was going on. I think my heart skipped a couple beats this weekend.

It was really cool. I got to see the Blue Angles fly. THAT was intense. If you ever get the chance to see those pilots fly, I highly recommend that you do indeed go!

I must mention as well how HOT some of those pilots are. WOW! There were a couple of times I had to pick my tounge up off the ground and apologize to my mom. Who in turn would apologize to me. Oh buddy! I’m going to need a little Top Gun in my life!

Guess who got a new JOB today!?!?!

My mom and I!!

We’ll be working for MBP Catering… AWSOME!! Our first job this weekend is the Air Show… How freakin’ Stellar is that??

I get so excited!

So yeah… That’s really the highlight of my day.

My weekend was alright. Nothing too exciting.

I got the day with Alan yesterday doing nothing but listening to the rain and thunder while playing Tiger Woods 07 and drinking too much coffee.

OH! OH! OH!!

Tiger woods 08 comes out on the 28th. As well as Ben Harpers new album!!

I want to see Ben so bad in September!! EEEKKK!!!

Prepare for a good ole Ashley Anne styled bitch session:

I’m f***ing tired.

I worked my butt off the past couple of days. I made alriiiight money for the most part.

I’m going to have to get used to the different class of people that I’m working with and for and around. But other than that its pretty dope being at an new store.

Something I’d like to bitch about though, is tipping.

I’m starting to think that most of the people that go out to eat don’t realize that the people that are taking care of them, bust their asses. I’ve been bitching about shitty tippers for a while now, and it never gets any better. I know that my one single voice isn’t strong enough to let the world know that 80% of them are ignorant in the ways of tipping their resturant servers.

I have found that there are those people out there that are standard $5 dollar tippers. I’m sorry but WRONG!! Do you people not realize that the all the sales I make at the end of the day go on record? That I have to claim at least 10% of my sales? That, when I sell $1200 in food on a weekend, I have to claim $120 dollars even if i didn’t make that? Granted I made more than that this weekend, it just bugs the fucking shit out of me.

And lets not forget that I have to tip out 3% of my sales to the host/hostess and bussers. So by there is another $35 bucks out of my pocket. Yet you people out there bitch about every fucking thing you can. There was a lady in the store this weekend that bitched because there were too many people in the damned resturant. I’m sorry ma’am but you’re at Fridays. On the weekend. If you’d like a more quieter place EAT AT HOME YOU WHORE!!

Pardon me

I’m just over it…

TIP!!! ALL THE TIME!! Make your servers day and over tip if you can!! They could be having a shitty day, have the want to go home and blow their brains out. And here you come along and tip them 35% of your bill. That would have them singing a different tune.

ONE MORE THING!! If you are paying seperate, you still tip according to what you spent. 20% is standard now. EVEN @ LUNCH TIME!! Just because its lunch you you don’t tip less!! TIP MORE! Its SLOW for us and you might be our only table. And if you split your check, You tip according to what you spent…

Do I need to post examples??

I mean seriously, if your bill comes to $72.83 What do you leave?? $5 dollars? $2 dollars? Think of it this way 10% is about 7 dollars… What do you think 20% would be?

Now I must go to sleep, for I have to work a Monday lunch tomorrow and make $35 bucks…

you fucking shitty tippers…

So, I’m an uber dork.

I’ve been working @ the T.G.I’s Near the Fashion Mall for quite some time. I don’t want to toot my own horn or anything, but I’m pretty good. I’m comfortable with it. (I love the resturant biz)

I just moved back to the southside after living in Broad Ripple for quite some time. I love Broad Ripple. However, due to a much over due break up, I’ve moved to the Southside, and I’m transferring to Greenwood, and start in just a few hours, (seeing as how its 4;59).

I’m like a school kid over here. Worried about all the new people. And Are they gonna like me, and really all that shit shouldn’t matter. But, like I previously stated, I’m an uber dork.

The new guy in my life was awfully helpful and said to me “Just give them some of that Ashley Anne charm everyone likes so much.” Isn’t he sweet? haha…

So I’ve been laying in bed trying to brush up on my charm and polish my best jokes!! lol I’m cheesy…

I should so be in bed, my best jokes are never going to win anybody over with the little sleep I’m going to allow my self to have to night.